Don't get defensive. We're referring to the back massage.
Ah yes. The back massage. If you're anything like us, we've gone into stores and sat in those massage chairs and they never seemed to get it quite right. Too much vibration (yes, that can be a bad thing) or the chair didn't seem to make its way to that exact kink that that masseuse at Burke Williams or Bliss always seemed to intimately understand. And so, we'd leave disappointed.
But we finally found one that does what it promises.
The Panasonic Real Pro Ultra Massage Chair deserves its name, thanks to a proprietary High Tech Auto Body Scanning system that maps out your back and provides you with a tailored massage that fits your body shape. It offers shiatsu, Swedish, deep-tissue, and arm and leg stretch massages, and works on your back, feet, calves, butt, arms, hands, waist, and shoulders. Oh, and it has a voice activation system so you can tell the chair exactly what you need – well, maybe not exactly, but you get the picture. The chair retails for $3,995.
Yet since we're all friends, we'll be honest. Like any massage chair, the aesthetics leave a lot to be desired. We are strongly suggesting you don't use this in a public living area in lieu of your Laz-Y-Boy (if you still have one of those, let us know and we'll opt you out of our mailing list). We wish we could reupholster it, but we don't think it's possible without screwing up the things that made us write about it to begin with.
And yes, we know that even the crème-de-la-crème of massage chairs misses a few of those body parts. Sorry, we can't help you there.